I wanted to write happy and positive thoughts today. The thoughts which will remind us of the moments we smiled and the moments we yearn to get back, the firsts and the lasts. I still remember the first day in my new school. The looks and smiles of other friends in class. The first time I drove a car. The first time I fell in love and my first kiss.
I still wonder how these firsts are still new and fresh with all emotions filled and smiles bubbling. It has been a long time since I left school or fell in love ( I don’t get fooled anymore) but still those firsts are thrilling. It’s hard to remember some special moments right now and it’s even hard to forget why those specials aren’t special anymore.
The pain is not in love anymore, it’s in the longing and loneliness which follows after being loved. If you were loved once just right, I bet, you will never find a replacement for it. That special moments you long to go through once again in your life will haunt you, until you die.
The first time you felt that you have someone to lean on, someone who show you the world, that feeling like you are living in a Jane Austen’s book. Thats not the pain, the memories are never a burden. It’s the profound desire to wanting it back, which we carry around with us is the burden. If you say love is pain, I strongly disagree with you. It’s the thought that you are not loved anymore is the actual pain.
I write these words as a cry, a loud painful cry to the creator….
Dear God, if you have given sweet memories for happiness, please find a way to give us a delete button to erase the loneliness. Amen.
Jane's Blog 